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The
DOs and DON'Ts of Dating

We have all been there - dates that wouldn't end
This page is dedicated to you, our visitors.
Here you may share experiences, tell stories and give suggestions to
your fellow single Jews.

If you'd like we can include your e-mail address, or just use your first name


Robb in New York - 5/14/02
H
ere is my advice for a good date:
--Do something exciting.  I know it sounds corny but if you take a date on a roller coaster and you get her heart beating she will subconsciously think that you are partly responsible for that.
--Don't have a first date at a coffee shop...Too Boring!
--Go out dancing, roller skating or even to Coney Island for that ride on the Cyclone!!!  Remember get her heart beating!!!!

Trust the Dating Mach'er!  This advice works!  ;-)

Shakatal@aol.com - 7/25/00
Remember that a woman makes a decision w/in the first 5 minutes if she likes you.  First impressions are important and it begins w/that phone call.  Keep the call short (so you have something's to talk about on the date), and be specific: Time, date, hour and if she has any particular interests she would like to pursue on the date.  Let her know you are considerate and chivalrous.

jaymagnet@mediaone.net - 12/1/99
It is important to be yourself as you do every day. Feel confident in yourself too. If you are uncomfortable, then you will both feel uncomfortable. Try to make it as positive as possible. You have got a lot to win, and nothing to lose. 

secondkyu@hotmail.com - 11/6/99
I really hate when I am trying to ask a girl out and she says something like, "Sorry, I am really busy with my friends".  It makes me feel miserable... The 1st thing that comes to my mind is, "and who am I... just a guy who is begging to go out with you... she could just say that she is not up to dating yet or she likes somebody else... no hard feelings then" Also one of the worst things is when a girl seems to want to go out with me but she keeps postponing the date and like in two weeks she would say that she is not ready yet. Then why on earth did not you say that before? Why did you waste like a month of my time. I could go out with somebody else! 

JDa1024@aol.com - 2/22/99
Maybe I'm a Rules girl but I think it is the height of rudeness for a guy to call once and leave a message with his name and phone number.  GUYS!!!   YOU'RE THE ONE WHO'S ASKING THE GIRL OUT.   She doesn't have to call you and beg. Even though it's the '90's don't expect her to call you back.  Call one more time.  Maybe she was busy.  She doesn't have to wait by the phone you know. If you get the machine on the second try then, yes, she should be a mensch and call you back.   At that point, it's the polite thing to do.

I once had a date call, leave his name and number, saying I should call him so he could talk and decide if it was "shayach" for us to go out.  Excuse me?   I didn't know if it was "shayach" (fitting) either but I was willing to go out and give him a chance.  I would not return such a phone call.  A few nights later my phone kept ringing and I got hangups. When I finally id'd the call and called back he angrily accused me of not returning his phone call and started grilling me. "Tell me about yourself and you're interests".  I know that in a way it is an interview but it is poor social skills to let the person know it.  I told him I didn't feel comfortable and would not go out.

So remember guys....at least call one more time if you get a machine.  It makes a girl feel like you're considerate and a gentleman. 

soberhi@yahoo.com    - 1/4/99
Do..... be yourself on the date. Act as crazy as you normally are.
Remember that she wants to have fun, just like you do. Plan a fun date.

Don't ...... try to be more yeshivishe than you are. Leave the costume (hat, jacket, gemara) at home.

CHIPLINK@aol.com - 5/21/98
For those of us "single dads and moms" 
Cut to the chase, find out how "they" deal w/ kids..
This summer, a day on the beach w/the kids !
What about the kids knowing ?  What's to know !
They think we're dead ?  Nah,

Especially, if the date is Jewish.  They'll see continuity, belonging,commonality.

Beandave@aol.com -  3/29/98:
Ladies,  seize the day!  When you feel that you may have good chemistry with a guy, for goodness sakes, ASK HIM OUT!  My last girlfriend asked me out.   I was totally flattered and excited.  Keep in mind, only two percent of people in the US are Jewish, only 1% is the opposite sex, and to find that person in your generation--wow the odds are tough.  So, see a sexy Jewish dude--don't be shy--ask em' out.

Carrie - 1/13/98:
One thing that I have learned is that it does both people a lot more good if they are out-right honest with each other--within reason.  If you're not having a good time on a date, say so.  Be nice about it of course, but say something.   You never know, that could be the icebreaker needed to get you to actually talk to each other.

From Sharon in New York:
I know it may sound petty, but I find it quite insulting when my date - (first time or otherwise) - does not show me the courtesy of arriving to our meeting clean and well groomed.  Could you imagine, a guy I met (only once, of course) showed up to our evening dinner date holding his briefcase in one hand, and a doggie-bag with leftover lunch goodies in the other?

 

Aaron of Atlanta Writes:
I love it when a girl is spontaneous and lets our first meeting flow naturally.  Nothing is more of a turn-off than sensing the mental checklist in action.  I don't want to be measured up and categorized... just be yourself!
 
Debbie from California - A positive story:
I really appreciate it when a guy takes the time to find out what I would like to do on our date.  I was set up by a friend on a blind date who called prior to our date to find out what it was I wanted to do so,if need be, he could arrange everything in advance.   I really appreciated the courtesy.
 
Carol from Manhattan - good advice:
I wish some people would get the message.  I once spent eight hours on a date that should have ended after the first half hour.  No amount of hinting gave this guy the message that all I wanted to do was go home.  Next time I will just take the direct approach.
 
Adele from Minneapolis Writes:
I should have known this guy was a winner when he showed up at my door an hour later than we agreed with no excuse, let alone an apology.  We walked in silence for 15 minutes to a park.  Once we began speaking we disagreed about everything until finally he just got up and walked off.  I obviously never saw him again.
 
 
A Suggestion from Moshe from San Diego:
I really think some girls over do it when dressing for a date.  I like it when a girl looks put together, but not like she is heading out to a wedding or some fancy shindig.

 

Send in your remarks and stories to datingDos&Donts@mazornet.com

 



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